Research shows that most people are not very good at making decisions based on little information or without being able to predict how things are going to turn out. And in a time of massive change, when nobody knows for certain how anything is going to turn out, it becomes easy for us to get stuck.
We’ve already seen two approaches that can make it easier for us to move forward: learning from people we admire and learning from our past. And a third approach involves learning from our future.
One of Stephen Covey’s Seven Habits of Highly Effective People is to “Begin with the end in mind.” Peter Drucker said almost the same when he recommended that the first step to success is to “Define what finishing well means to you.”
We will be able to move more easily through this time of change if begin with our ultimate end in mind: if we define what it will take to finish our life well.
To do this, imagine yourself on your deathbed, looking back at your life, and ask yourself:
“What will it take for me to have made good use of my time?”
“What will it take for me to have lived a worthwhile life?“
“What do I want my epitaph to say?”
Or if that seems a little heavy,
“What do I want to look back on when I’m 90?”
To help yourself navigate this time of change more easily, do this now. Identify between six and eight broad categories of things that are important to you: that if you achieve them you will have lived a worthwhile life.
Given that the world is changing unpredictably, it is probably better not to pick specific outcomes but instead broad categories that could be achieved in various ways. This gives you flexibility. But it’s your life, it’s your list. Choose what is important to you.
What will it take for you to live a worthwhile life?
What will finishing your life well look like to you?
When you have found your answers there are a couple of ways that you could use them.
First, you could define in detail what you think an ideal outcome looks like for each category (what would ’10’ look like in each case) and then create a detailed plan to get there.
But in a changing world that plan might not last very long. And as you get older your priorities might change.
So a more flexible approach is to define what ’10’ looks like in each category, and then decide what actions you will take — today, this week, this month — to move yourself towards your goals. This allows you to remain both focused and flexible as you and the world around you change.
Finally, a third way to use this knowledge is that, whenever you find yourself needing to take a decision based on little information and without knowing how things are going to turn out, you simply ask yourself which course of action will lead you best towards whatever a worthwhile life looks like to you. Then do that.
In a churning world, what matters most is no longer whether we achieve a particular outcome. In a churning world, what matters most is that we spend the time we have working towards the priorities that matter most to us. We work to become whoever we most want to become. We work to give ourself the best chance of living whatever a worthwhile life looks like to us.
As Steve Jobs put it:
“Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”
They say that when you die your whole life flashes before your eyes — so make sure it’s worth watching. What will it take for you to have lived a worthwhile life?
Adapted from Inner Leadership: a framework and tools for building inspiration in times of change.
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